…kommunikointieroa miehen ja naisen välillä: http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/04/01/6-ways-men-and-women-communicate-differently/
4. When She Is Feeling Down …
He will want to tackle her problems head on, like a fireman. He feels impatient to put the fire out as quickly as possible. For him, the quickest way to put the fire out is by giving solutions. Because he wants so badly to provide for his spouse, he may take her mood personally and defend himself. He might hear things literally, not realizing that when his spouse is upset she will use words as toolsto exploreand expressdifficult emotions.
By using words as tools to explore and express her difficult emotions when she is upset, she is able to process her negative emotions and let them go. She values support and nurture, and is most fulfilled by sharing, cooperation and community. When he shows interest in her by asking caring questions or expressing heartfelt concerns she feelsloved and cared for. He is fulfilling her first primary love need.
5. When He Is Feeling Down …
He will often withdraw into his “cave” (becoming quiet and withdrawn) when he’s upset or stressed. A man’s “cave time” is like a short vacation: he reduces stress by forgetting about his problems and focusing on other things like watching television, reading the newspaper, or playing video games.
He might avoid communication with his spouse during times of duress. If she persists with nurturing questions or criticism,hewithdrawseven further, fearing that his partner doesn’t trust him to take care of business on his own. However, with her support and understanding, a man will return and be more emotionally available, caring, and loving.
She might interpret her spouse’s silence as a sign that she is failing him or that she’s losing him. She instinctivelytriesto nurturehim throughhis problems by asking an abundance of caring questions. Or she may react defensively out of fear that her own need for healthy open communication is not being respected within the relationship.
Ultimately, she can do more for him by appreciating his space, which shows him that she trustshim to work out theproblem on hisown. Trusting is one of the greatest giftsshe has to offer him. In the meantime she should do something nurturing for herself, so she won’t resent him when he emerges from his “cave time.”
Ohos, tulipa lainattua pitkästi!
Joka tapauksessa elämä on rikasta ja ihanaa, kun ymmärtää toisen ihmisen erilaisuuden, eikä vaadi häntä toimimaan ja käyttäytymään oman kaavan mukaan.
There are many different right ways to live.
Hiljaisen viikon pohdintoihin…